Jayne

We live in the Twin Cities, Minnesota area. My Husband and I are in the process of adopting our seven year old niece and our five year old nephew. (They've decided to call us Mom and Dad when they moved in with us.) They moved in with us (from Pennsylvania) in December 1999. Prior to moving in with us, they were in foster care for close to three years. Currently we are their "foster" parents. Their birthmother voluntarily terminated her parental rights. Their birthfather (and My Brother) was not as willing to terminate his parental rights, and has not made any effort to contact / see the children in three years. A hearing to terminate his parental rights was recently held. He was a "no-show." If he does not appeal in 30 days - it is a done deal and we can then petition for adoption. Hopefully it will be finalized in 2001.

Our kids experienced a great deal of abuse and neglect in their short
lives - and have a number of issues - including Attachment Disorder. We went throught the two week attachment therapy intensive in September 2000 (Attachment Center of Minnesota). The therapy included holding therapy and narratives. The holding therapy and narratives were done by us, the parents. (We would hold them and rock them and tell them that they deserved to be loved, and we would tell them what it would have been like if they had been our babies from the very beginning.) EMDR was used by the Lead Therapist. She has been very helpful to my husband and I on handling various behavioral issues too.

We have noticed a change in the childrens' behavior - especially our seven year old girl. We are still having some control issues with our five year old boy. We have had some follow-up appointments for him - and may need to follow-up again soon.